I have sickened and tired so many of my friends with my talk about how I love to write, want to be a writer, or am writing something and often shoved it in their faces to read and comment on it. I can feel how some of them may resent me for it; mainly because what I wrote was probably crap.But written word has been the only thing that got me through anything and it’s the thing I recognized with, without having been told to do so. It was just something I stumbled upon one day in my life and decided was beautiful. And I write crap and throw it away and hate it and then I write some more crap and so on. And I often ask myself if I will one day just decide that it’s not worth it and stop.
I may not be a good writer although no one has brought up the guts to say so to my face so far. I don’t think I’m very good but I do it anyways because I love it. It’s what I think a terrible singer does. They probably sound like a clucking hen, disrupting everyone’s peace with their singing but they they don’t stop because they love it.
I started to think about how some of the world’s richest literary works are actually so boring with such intricacy and words dripping sophistication that you may need to sit down with several dictionaries in order to understand them. Then there are our new age literature books, words easy, concept understandable and story told good and that’s the end. Yet, these books aren’t considered high rate literature. They just pass through your life and you never have to read them twice. They make you happy for a while and pass on.
So what makes a piece of writing good? Is it its level of difficulty to understand? Or the story?
So I got to thinking that maybe I’m not going to be a good writer because I have this fear of what I write to contain a part of my life that I don’t want to show people. There would be my deepest feelings and emotions all on paper and reading it would emotionally exhaust me. But I would still go out and read sadistic and emotive stories other people have written and I would sit and think about it. And it stayed with me times after I had put the book down.
I understood how good literature comes about. It makes people sit down and think. And it stays with them forever.
People complained about how Dan Brown violated sacred religion and how Charles Dickens was a sadist but they still read the books and thought about them.
I don’t have that sophistication to make worlds difficult to understand. People could read something I write and downright hate it but I want them to think about it and I decided that maybe the best literature isn’t sophistry or length but the power to touch people’s minds and make them think. Let them hate it, let them burn it, but let them think and have my ideas knocking around in their minds for days. Writing shouldn’t be the run to make people like you and pay you anyways.